If you manage managers, growing them is one of your highest-leverage activities. A strong senior EM can grow 4–8 new managers over their career; a weak one produces dysfunction that ripples for years. The interview increasingly probes this skill at director-level loops.
The new-EM transition
Engineers becoming managers face a transition that is hard to overstate:
- Output is now your team’s output, not yours
- Coding time drops dramatically
- Identity from technical excellence shifts to people leadership
- 1:1s become the highest-leverage hour
- Calibration, performance management, hiring all new
Many engineers love the idea of management until they actually do it.
The first 90 days for a new EM
Coach them through:
- Listen-first mode — don’t fix things on day 1
- 1:1 with every report; build understanding
- Establish operating cadence (1:1s, standups, planning)
- Learn the calibration and review processes
- Understand the company-level context
Common pitfalls of new EMs
Coding too much
Comfort zone of the IC. Watch for: new EM coding 50%+ of the time, missing 1:1s, neglecting strategic work.
Coaching: explicitly limit coding time. “I want you below 25% IC work this quarter.” Reward the management work in feedback.
Avoiding hard conversations
Underperformance, conflict, performance reviews — new EMs often dodge these. Watch for: vague feedback to reports, no PIPs even when warranted, glossing over performance issues.
Coaching: practice the conversations together. Role-play. Provide a script for the first time.
Trying to be friends with everyone
The peer-to-manager transition is hard. Watch for: avoiding feedback, refusing to address problems, drinks with one report and not others.
Coaching: distinguish friendship from professional respect. Build trust through fairness, not popularity.
Over-engineering management
New EMs read too many books and try to apply every framework. Watch for: convoluted 1:1 templates, excessive paperwork, “let me think about this” delays.
Coaching: simplify. Pick 3 things that matter. Do them well.
The 1:1 with your direct EM-report
Different from 1:1 with an IC:
- Less project status, more team health
- How are their reports doing?
- What management decisions are pending?
- Where are they stuck on a hard conversation?
- What support do they need from you?
Goal: develop their judgment, not give them answers.
The skip-level relationship
You should know your manager-reports’ reports. Quarterly skip-level 1:1s. Listen for:
- How is their manager doing?
- What do they wish was different?
- Are they getting career growth?
This gives you data your direct reports may not share.
Co-running their first hard cycle
For a new EM’s first calibration / performance review cycle:
- Walk through how to write reviews
- Sit in on calibration as observer
- Help draft promo packets
- Coach through delivering hard ratings
The investment compounds — by their second cycle, they are mostly autonomous.
When the new EM is not working out
Sometimes the transition fails:
- They miss 1:1s repeatedly
- Reports complain to skip-level
- Team output drops
- They retreat into coding
Options:
- Direct feedback and coaching
- Move them back to IC (with face-saving framing if possible)
- Let them fail forward to a different role / company
Most companies allow IC-EM-IC moves, especially in the first year. Frame it as “this role wasn’t the right fit,” not “they failed.”
Promoting from within vs hiring external
Internal promotion: knows the team, faster ramp, cultural continuity. Risk: peer-to-manager dynamic, may lack management experience.
External hire: fresh perspective, prior management experience. Risk: longer ramp, may not fit culture.
Most healthy orgs do both. Aim for ~50/50 on EM hires.
Frequently Asked Questions
How long should a new EM take to be self-sufficient?
6–9 months for basic operations. 12–18 months to fully own their team’s strategy and outcomes.
What if my new EM is more senior than me technically?
Common — your job is to grow their management, not their technical depth. Lean into your management experience; defer to them on technical questions.
Should new EMs still write code?
Some, especially small teams. Cap at 25% of time. Drop further as team grows.