If you manage managers, growing them is one of your highest-leverage activities. A strong senior EM can grow 4–8 new managers over their career; a weak one produces dysfunction that ripples for years. The interview increasingly probes this skill at director-level loops.
The new-EM transition
Engineers becoming managers face a transition that is hard to overstate:
- Output is now your team’s output, not yours
- Coding time drops dramatically
- Identity from technical excellence shifts to people leadership
- 1:1s become the highest-leverage hour
- Calibration, performance management, hiring all new
Many engineers love the idea of management until they actually do it.
The first 90 days for a new EM
Coach them through:
- Listen-first mode, don’t fix things on day 1
- 1:1 with every report; build understanding
- Establish operating cadence (1:1s, standups, planning)
- Learn the calibration and review processes
- Understand the company-level context
Common pitfalls of new EMs
Coding too much
Comfort zone of the IC. Watch for: new EM coding 50%+ of the time, missing 1:1s, neglecting strategic work.
Coaching: explicitly limit coding time. “I want you below 25% IC work this quarter.” Reward the management work in feedback.
Avoiding hard conversations
Underperformance, conflict, performance reviews: new EMs often dodge these. Watch for: vague feedback to reports, no PIPs even when warranted, glossing over performance issues.
Coaching: practice the conversations together. Role-play. Provide a script for the first time.
Trying to be friends with everyone
The peer-to-manager transition is hard. Watch for: avoiding feedback, refusing to address problems, drinks with one report and not others.
Coaching: distinguish friendship from professional respect. Build trust through fairness, not popularity.
Over-engineering management
New EMs read too many books and try to apply every framework. Watch for: convoluted 1:1 templates, excessive paperwork, “let me think about this” delays.
Coaching: simplify. Pick 3 things that matter. Do them well.
The 1:1 with your direct EM-report
Different from 1:1 with an IC:
- Less project status, more team health
- How are their reports doing?
- What management decisions are pending?
- Where are they stuck on a hard conversation?
- What support do they need from you?
Goal: develop their judgment, not give them answers.
The skip-level relationship
You should know your manager-reports’ reports. Quarterly skip-level 1:1s. Listen for:
- How is their manager doing?
- What do they wish was different?
- Are they getting career growth?
This gives you data your direct reports may not share.
Co-running their first hard cycle
For a new EM’s first calibration / performance review cycle:
- Walk through how to write reviews
- Sit in on calibration as observer
- Help draft promo packets
- Coach through delivering hard ratings
The investment compounds — by their second cycle, they are mostly autonomous.
When the new EM is not working out
Sometimes the transition fails:
- They miss 1:1s repeatedly
- Reports complain to skip-level
- Team output drops
- They retreat into coding
Options:
- Direct feedback and coaching
- Move them back to IC (with face-saving framing if possible)
- Let them fail forward to a different role / company
Most companies allow IC-EM-IC moves, especially in the first year. Frame it as “this role wasn’t the right fit,” not “they failed.”
Promoting from within vs hiring external
Internal promotion: knows the team, faster ramp, cultural continuity. Risk: peer-to-manager dynamic, may lack management experience.
External hire: fresh perspective, prior management experience. Risk: longer ramp, may not fit culture.
Most healthy orgs do both. Aim for ~50/50 on EM hires.
Frequently Asked Questions
How long should a new EM take to be self-sufficient?
6–9 months for basic operations. 12–18 months to fully own their team’s strategy and outcomes.
What if my new EM is more senior than me technically?
Common. Your job is to grow their management, not their technical depth. Lean into your management experience; defer to them on technical questions.
Should new EMs still write code?
Some, especially small teams. Cap at 25% of time. Drop further as team grows.
Practice the behavioral round:
